TITANIC MADE BY SHUBHAS GHAI
- Ever wondered what would be in " Titanic
" if the same was made by Subhash Ghai.
- The name of the movie? " Naav Doobta hai.
Pyaar Doobta Nahin". Well here it goes!
The ship would be overflowing with extras whom you normally find
in movies that
have a court scene full of people or a Janta basti full of janta.
Madhuri has to be Rose and who else but Shahrukh as JJJJJ JJJ
name would be Phool and Shahrukh's name would be Chakh. (Alphabet "a"
deliberately left out)
The Titanic would be sailing from Madh Island to the Gateway of
Madhuri would be dancing in the rain with Shahrukh in tow.
Rose's fiance would be Gulshan Grover who mutters "bad
he sees Shahrukh.
Shahrukh would eventually find his long lost mom AaBaap Singh on
Shahrukh also gets his sister nanhi gudiya.
The movie would only last for 7 hours.
The music director would be of course AR Rehman who would compose a
disco on the boat.
The boat sinks, not because of the iceberg but because of excessive
climax would surely have at least 10 bomb blasts in spite of the ship
sinking. These would be thrown by Amrish Puri ( Durjan Singh) at Shahrukh.
infamous lovemaking in the back seat of the car; the car would be a
Maruti 800 ( very less space !!! got it?)
would be only 12 songs in the movie.
Remember Rose changing her mind about jumping into the water? In our case,
Madhuri changes her mind, since. .. since.. the Titanic is moving along Mahim
creek and the water stinks. Eeeeks!!
14] How can
I forget the painting scene? Shahrukh would be painting Madhuri's
portrait with Madhuri fully covered minus the locket. ( Censors yaar ). Of course
the portrait would be drawn by MF Hussain.
- 15] Most
important!! The number of times the word "Bachaoooo" would be yelled
would be a record in the history of cinema.
Amitabh Bacchan would make a guest appearance as the Ship's captain and
would be waltzing with Madhuri during the party. Of course, he would not die.
Amrish Puri would die while trying to swim towards Worli sea face because of
the water stench.
Madhuri and Shahrukh should be singing a song in the Swiss Alps. So what
if the full movie should be in the ship.
- 19] The
focus shifts to Mandakini only when she falls into the sea and is fully
drenched. Till then she is never shown.
- 20] Only
during the climax would Aasoo Devi tell Chakh about how Durjan troubled
them. Chakh would then yell " Kutte mein tera khoon pee jaaoonga". The
ensuing fight would only last for an hour.
- 21] There
would be an antakshari for the "drowners" conducted by Annu Kapoor
instead of the trio Playing the violin.